Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Finally alittle more

Not sure what I did this week different... I have to wonder if maybe not running this week was a good thing b/c muscle does weigh more and maybe I lost a little of my muscle.. who knows.. all I know is that 3 pds is on record baby.. lol I will start running again today.. Doctor said it should be fine to start back up.. Even if not running helped last week.. I would so much rather be in shape then lose all the weight and have my lose flab flapping every where.. I mean already when I shake my arms the fat is almost hitting me in my face.. which reminds me to start doing under arm exercises.. Doing weights stinks..errr why does everything we should do to keep us in shape feel intolerable... So week 4 and I have to say that nothing about not eating is getting easier.. I mean right now I want french fries... I saw a thing on the TV last night that said salty, fried, fattening foods can be just as addicting as smoking, alcohol, drugs etc.. You know I have to say in some little way I agree with this.. I have never had any of those addictions but, I want those foods all the time and if I'm not getting to eat them then they are on my mind and if they are there I will eat them even if it's just one.. So to me not eating those foods when I want and how much I want is very hard for me.. but I shall overcome.. one day at a time.. Maybe I need to go to a food addiction meeting.. lol oh wait I guess that would be considered Weight Watchers.. On a positive note... I feel hopeful for the next week and a little stronger on my journey to weight happy.. tks for the support..

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Life gets in the way

Not to sure about how Tues. weigh in will go this week b/c life just got in the way.. Thurs. I went to lunch with a girlfriend and we shared, but I still cheated a little (wings).. man were they good.. and then last night I made cupcakes with the kids and I kept licking the spoon..errrr and that was good too.. lol.. So I did run on Wed.. even though my knees still hurt from the race, but then I had a mole taken off my leg on Fri. and it had to be stitched up, so I can't run for a couple of days, b/c it was in the fold of my leg behind the knee.. I feel like this will be a set back, b/c I depended on the calories I was burning by running.. I don't want to keep just going down one pound a week or else I feel I will start to cheat more often.. I'm determined to start running again on Mon., so that I can mentally feel like I'm burning some of the food in my body off.. So I'm just trying to keep long term thoughts and short term goals... Tks for the support..

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

A little goes a long way

Well at least the my weight still went down.. I really thought I might have lost more b/c of the race, but I think all the pasta I ate counter acted on the calories I lost at the run.. But I still am optimistic b/c I still lost.. I know I have to start journaling better and getting back into my running.. My legs and knees feel better today, so tomorrow I think I will be ready to get back on the treadmill..uggg.. The good news is that I still am getting to eat the things I like.. Just have to watch the serving sizes.. It is a pain to have to look at labels, but I know it will become a habit after awhile.. I have to admit choosing a banana or yogurt over pancakes or donuts makes me insane, but I have no option and that pisses me off... It kinda just makes me want to hibernate in my house so I'm not tempted, but I know that is no kind of life.. I have to learn to manage my food and have a life while doing it.. I'm getting better with temptation, but the real test will be when my hubby wants to eat Mexican.. lol lol.. Positive thought.. Rome was not built in a day, so my weight won't come off in a day either.. Lets all get weight happy together.. Have a good week..

Monday, March 22, 2010

Shamrock On

Whoo hooo I'm done with the race and I actually did much better than I expected myself to do.. I ran the whole half marathon and came in under 3 hours.. 2:50:13 is my actual time.. It was hard, but as I was running I just kept telling myself that if I'm going to do this then I have to run the whole thing.. At about mile 12 I did start to break down and get emotional, but my sister calmed me down and kept saying you can't run this whole time and then give up on the last mile and she was right, so I kept running and in the end I was so proud that I ran the 13.1 miles without stopping or walking... So now that the race is done, I have to kept up my running, b/c I have problem with just stopping after the race is over.. and I can't do that b/c I will once again become out of shape and then my eating with go back to my old habits again... and then of course the weight will start to climb again..errr and I'm trying to lose this chunk not gain more of it.. lol I'm thinking I need to sign up for a couple 8k (5 miles) through out the year, so I don't lose the drive to stay in shape.. I can't stand running, but it's the only thing that makes me feel like I'm burning calories... I kinda had a bad eating week.. I think it was the stress and emotions of the race that I gave into temptations a little this week and then I ate a lot of pasta on Saturday to get ready for the race on Sunday and I think that might show tomorrow on the scale.. I will be happy as long as I don't gain.. So I have my mind back in the game and now I just have to move into this next week with a weight loss mind set.. Lets all become weight happy..

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Not too bad

Well this weeks weight loss was not as good as last, but hey a little over 2 pds is not bad just going slow... I knew it wasn't going to be a fast process, but it's hard to stay so motivated when it comes off slow.... You know how people say aren't you motivated b/c you see the weight loss coming off?.. I have to admit NO.. seeing the weight come off does nothing for me.. I think it is b/c I don't see it in my body... Maybe if tomorrow my arms didn't jiggle or if my belly was flat then maybe I would say whooo hooo I can do this, but I know that won't happen over night or even over a couple of months.. So I have to honestly think about this process every day and every time I go to stick something in my mouth for me to lose weight.. anyone else feel this way??? I'm the kind of person who has to be mentally in the game to win... That is why I started this blog, so I would have to stay in the game and be accountable for my weeks weight.. Plus having the support has helped a lot.. So last week I did watch what I ate and I have to admit I still enjoyed some things I like.. I had pizza, Mexican and Buffalo Wild Wings and still lost over 2 pds, I'm sure I would have lost more if I didn't eat those things, but I have to find a way to enjoy the foods I love and still lose.. So far it is working... Thought for the week.. Enjoy the things you love just in little perfect portions.. Lets all get to Weight Happy together..

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Better weekend

So this weekend was much better than last.. the only thing is I did not exercise at all.. So I will have to run Mon-Thurs to be ready for the race on Sunday.. I'm still very nervous about this race, so I kinda can't wait till it is over, so I can check that off my bucket list.. I'm a little worried about my weigh in on Tues... I had my visitor come today and I always seem hungrier and heavier the week she is visting.. so we will see what the scale says.. I have been eating a lot of chicken and have to say I'm about over that and ready to move on to maybe some fish.. Today I did have one snack b/c I crave sweets bad.. I had 3 reduced fat chips ahoy cookies with a little milk.. Not bad, but I wanted to eat more and I almost did, but stopped myself and instead played a game with my son.. errrr but don't you know those cookies are still on my mind and it's been like 5 hrs since I ate them.. Why is food always on my mind.. errr.. So I will probably go to sleep with those darn cookies on my mind.. Hope I don't dream I'm cookie monster and sleep walk in the middle of the night to my kitchen.. lol Well I will blog again on Tues.. until then lets think weight happy...

Friday, March 12, 2010

Bad day

Last night I only got about 2 1/2 hr sleep, b/c I have a hard time sometimes shutting my mind down and not worrying over things.. So needless to say I was tired and on edge and you know what that means.. I was not in a caring mode to watch my eating today.. errr why do I let this happen to me.. I was decent until dinner when once again we went to Mexican (hubby favorite food).. I'm thinking maybe I should just put it on my can't ever go eat there again list, but why should I.. I just need to be more disciplined when I go there... Isn't it about learning to eat better, so you can still eat things you like but in moderation.. Well I have decided not to beat myself up to much b/c I'm just beginning and I will get there.. One day I will be able to go to Mexican and not eat 20 buckets of chips (j/j) w/white sauce.. yuummm.. I have to admit I did feel guilty after I ate, but the guilt only lasted until we paid the bill.. lol lol. So tomorrow is a new day and I will most defiantly run tomorrow b/c by then my calves might feel fine enough to run on.. Oh yeah be aware your calves with hurt the next day after Zumba, but just like anything new you do, your body has to get use to it.. So happy dieting and just remember we are human, so you can have a bad day too.. Positive thought.. I could have ate a lot more.. lol lol

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Zumba Time

Today started out pretty emotional.. not sure why, but just felt very overwhelmed and tired.. but after I dropped the dog off at the groomers.. Took daughter to gymnastics... it was me time at the YMCA. So today I tried another new class.. Today I did a Zumba salsa class. It was a mix of salsa dancing, hip hop and butt shaking.. It was so much more my style then Yoga.. The instructor said 1 hr of Zumba is 400-600 calories depending on how much you put into your movements.. I think I did about 500 b/c I was trying my hardest and sweating at the same time.. I'm sure I looked like a dancing monkey at first, but I eventually got the movements and I was on like donkey kong.. lol.. So then I stopped for gas and don't you know this skinny chick comes out with a Coke (not diet) and a really big and awesome looking donut in her hand.. I found myself thinking why in the world can she eat that and stay skinny, but if I ate that I would gain 5 pds... It does frustrate me sometimes to see some of my friends eat what they want and stay thin and then others like me have to consistently watch what I put in my mouth down to the BLT (bites, licks, tastes).. I know it's all about out bodies make up but man oh man I wish I could wake up tomorrow and be able to be a whatever I want eater.. Then I came home and started to fell guilty about not running today with the race only 1 1/2 weeks away, so I ran a mile outside.. and I loved it, it was so pretty today.. It lifted my spirits and I even rode bikes with the kids.. I did good on eating today... I had a turkey sandwich (mustard, 2% cheese and 40% fat free bread), baked Doritos and 2 bites of choc. cake w/2 strawberries.. for lunch and hubby is baking a chicken for dinner, so today is almost over and it ended up being a good day.. Positive thought of the day is... trying new things can you suprise you...

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Optimistic

Okay so the first week was hard and for some reason long.. Maybe b/c I had to concentrate on not eating so much all week so it seemed the days dragged. So I'm happy about the weight loss but keep in mind that I usually always lose a lot the first week b/c I go from eating unconscious to eating conscious.. lol l My biggest struggle is still wanting to eat what I want when I want. I start to think to my self that it's just not right that I have to watch what I eat then I say oh a few chips won't hurt and I go to grab them, but I stop myself b/c I can't have an excuse.. This is my body and how it works and I have to take accountability for it.. errrr I know rt it stinks... I use to tell people I was big boned and could never look skinny, but that was all a fabrication b/c when I lost all that weight on weight watchers I looked just as skinny as any other 125 pdr, so I know this statement (in my case) is not true.. Oh and seriously still making the kids their food is about to throw me over the edge.. lol I made mac n cheese last night and man did it smell good..but I didn't eat any, but I'm not sure if it's b/c I had the will power or the fact that I knew I had to weigh in.. I guess this week we will see if I have more will power.. I can definitely tell you I'm still hungry but my edgy feeling is starting to go away.. Tk you to my supportive husband who always knows the first week is always the hardest.. Tks for all the support bloggers.. Positive thought for the day is when I look at my kids the stretch marks just don't bother me as much..

Sunday, March 7, 2010

I knew it

So just like I predicted I think I probably over ate this weekend. I had sushi on Saturday, which some might not say it is bad, but it is when you eat 3 rolls covered with rice and one of them was a fried roll.. errr then we had meatloaf sandwiches for leftovers.. I put mayo on it.. bad girl.. Then today I went and had Mexican with a friend after church and of course the chips and white sauce were calling my name.. I'm hoping maybe I can just have a yogurt for dinner and call it a weekend.. but see here is the problem I have it in my mind that I have to eat 3 meals a day, even if I'm not hungry.. why is this.. I have no clue, but I'm going to try tonight to break the habit tonight... I couldn't run this weekend b/c I still hurt for the 8 miles, so I was not able to work the extra calories off at all (an excuse). To top it off today when my computer was booting up, I caught a glimpse of myself in the screen and noticed I took up the whole screen.. I could have just passed out right there from having bad body image... I'm just going to be a good girl tomorrow and run and hope that on Tuesday when I weigh in.. I at least lost a couple of pds.. I mean come on what is this all for if I don't see some result.. Positive for today.. I like my eye color.. blue/grn.. Keep praying bloggers b/c come tuesday I might handcuff myself to my bed if I didn't lose anything..

Saturday, March 6, 2010

The unhappy 8 miler

Yesterday was a day I just want to forget. It started out real good, spending time with the family... went bowling with the kids and then went to Taco Bell.. Now I was real good at Taco Bell I only ate 1 soft taco and some pinto & cheese.. Now here is where it all goes down hill. First off I slpit my Gap jeans when I went to sit down and it looked like a hernia was coming form my inner thigh, b/c my chunk was now sticking through the split.. Then I went to the bathroom and as I was pulling them up to fit over my chunk on my hips I tore a belt loop off by my butt side.. I mean come on.. then my sister asked me to do a 8 mile run with her. Now I have never run for 8 miles and I have only been able to almost do 5 miles for this run I'm training for. So I do the run and I feel good, I mean real good and I run the whole time (1hr 50 min of it).. I know I'm a slow runner.. lol So I drink some water and then boom it hits me like a thunder bolt.. I start throwing up.. but I feel better and now we all eat Arby's ( you know I have been craving it), well I only eat half of my sandwich and start to feel sick again.. and bomb again I throw up.. so now it's time to drive home, so on the way home what happens.. of course I have to pull over and well you know what then happens.. today I'm better, my knees hurt but at least I'm not on death row.. Now I'm real nervous about this run I have to do in 2 wks (13.1 miles).. what if I start to throw up while running.. I mean that is so something that would happen to me.. lol I do have to say that the lemonade vitamin water is the only thing I could keep down, so maybe there is something to that water.. Well on a positive note I ran off about 700 calories yesterday.. whoo hooo

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Yoga anyone

So today I tried my first yoga class and I think maybe the last.. The teacher was great and I do feel more relaxed, but for some reason the whole time I kept thinking of an Arby's roast beef.. I mean wasn't I suppose to be concentrating on my core and balance. I would have rather of been balancing an Arby melt in the palm of my hand.. I also like to do workouts that make my heart pump.. I should find a hip hop class to do, so I can shake my ba dunk a dunk.. lol.. but on a good note I did do good today with no snacking and drinking water (which I can't stand).. the bad thing was I ate late b/c of the yoga class, but maybe the calories I burned (I think 200) will counter balance.. Lets just say it did, so I can sleep better tonight.. lol.. I'm a little scared about the weekend approaching, always tend to cheat on the weekends.. Tks for the support and today I think I like my feet they are cute and little..

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Manic Wednesday

Today started off to be a bad one.. The car seats weren't in the car, so of course I got frustrated since we were already running late.. Then there were some chips on the floor of the car (don't know why they were there is the first place). Can you believe I thought about eating one.. OMG.. So then I had to vacuum out the car in 35 degree weather.. the best part is I spent .75 cents on the vacuum and I could have blew in air and sucked better than that thing did.. Went to the YMCA today and for some reason the calorie count is always lower on their treadmills. So I ran 2 miles and walked 1.12miles. Total time was 43 min and 353 calories.. Not to bad but man did it stink.. So now we are home and I'm so hungry that if the chips were still in the car I would have ate them.. I make myself a lean cuisine to eat and who is next to me eating it with me (my daughter). I mean for real I don't get a lot to eat as it is and here she wants some.. errr, but in true mommy fashion, I shared.. So hopefully this wanting to eat all the time and agitation about not eating will subside soon. Oh and hubby just called to say sorry about the chips (so that is how they got there)..lol lol now I can relax and pray I don't eat for the next at least couple of hours.. Where is the gum..

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Man oh Man

I knew my weight had started to climb, but I did not know it was past 175.. So after being a little in shock over my weight I still almost put the fork that I was making the kids pancakes with dripping with syrup and butter into my mouth.. I mean are you kidding me.. These are the habits I need to break and NOW.. Plus I can't stand to drink water, so this is going to be a mental struggle for me.. I have to get into the mind set that I can't wake up tommorow and the weight be gone.. THIS WILL TAKE SOME TIME.... and I will be hungry and on edge for at least a couple of days until I get use to not eating a mound of food a day.. Im off to have my coffee and I will measure out 2tbsp of creamer.. so back to one cup a day to save on extra calories.. Also going to have to journal so I can make sure I'm not just sticking things in my mouth for no reason.. Okay wish me luck...

Monday, March 1, 2010

Why is it so hard

Hello:
So I have decided to start this blog so that I can have an accountability to someone for my weight loss.. I did weight watchers for 2 1/2 yrs and stayed thin, but then had kids and quit my job to stay home.. I called the group Jigglers b/c I'm fine with being a bigger girl, I'm just not happy seeing it all jiggle when I wiggle. On my blog I will post each Tuesday my weight.. I will only weigh in once a week b/c I know I will be discouraged if I check the scale each day.. I will try get on each day to update you on how I'm doing and what is or isn't working for me. I will be honest and will even let you know when I'm about to eat all the snacks in my house.. lol.. I don't understand why it is so hard to lose weight at this time in my life.. am I lazy, don't care or am I just stuck in a weight rut that I'm destine to stay in? I will also let you know what is going on in my life and maybe you can shine light on why I can't lose weight.. Please be honest in this blog b/c honesty is the only way we can help each other.. I would love for us to post tips on things we have tried or things that may be good but low in calories to eat.. Please don't hold back on your thoughts, ideas and frustrations about this issue.. If you are thinner it's okay too b/c we all struggle with also keeping the weight off and we all need someone to vent to about this topic.. Thank you for blogging with me and I hope we can stick with this and maybe in 6 months we can change the title from Jigglers to weight happy..